Rocky IV: Our freedom's up against the ropes
Is it East versus West? Is it man against man? Can we handle another montage?
Some men are too good for this world. Some men must be sacrificed for the cause of liberty. Some men have to die at the hands of a 260-pound Russian boxer at a Las Vegas hotel after dancing around in an Uncle Sam hat to a second-rate James Brown tune. It’s the order of things.
Without Apollo Creed’s death, you don’t have a re-energized Rocky Balboa, sprinting up Siberian mountains and chopping down trees. You don’t have Rocky felling Drago in a bloody Moscow brawl. And you certainly don’t have Rocky ending the Cold War and ushering a new era of peace and prosperity.
Ironic, too, that it was Apollo who plucked Rocky out of obscurity, back in the original Rocky, otherwise known as the good one, the Oscar-winning film that probably shouldn’t have had a sequel. Let alone five. Or six. Or eight. I’m not even sure how many anymore.1
Back then in 1976, nobody could have foreseen that Rocky would save the world. He was a two-bit, broken-down southpaw fighter who spent his days being the gentlest leg-breaker for a Philly loan shark you’re ever gonna meet. He had two turtles, Cuff and Link. And a filthy apartment that for some reason had broken beer bottles smashed into the lining of the couch. He was washed up, a bum, a palooka, a tomato can.
Rocky relates to Rocky IV like a starter home relates to Trump Tower. It’s difficult to see how one came from the other. The original film is a slow-burning character piece. You might forget how long it takes to build Rocky’s ramshackle world – the extended sequences with Adrian and (groan) Paulie. The audience is aware that his big shot at fame is coming – courtesy of Apollo – long before Rocky himself finds out, which comes about an hour into the picture. The climactic fight, at the end of the movie, takes up just nine minutes of screen time. It is a subtle, lovely work that moves to its own rhythm.
Each Rocky picture grew larger in scope and more bombastic (as Sylvester Stallone took more control) culminating in the fourth effort, which ramped matters up to a geopolitical scale. Where the original Rocky was sort of a cross between a down-and-dirty 70s neorealist piece and an old-fashioned boxing melodrama, Rocky IV is clearly a product of the Reagan 80s: slick, pumped-up and corporate. And I’m just talking about Stallone’s physique.2
Gone is the Bill Conti streetwise score and in its place is an unholy stew of the worst 80s “power anthems” you’ve ever strayed across that make “Eye of the Tiger” sound like “Hey Jude.”
I’ll just throw the soundtrack cassette in the boombox for you. Here’s “Burning Heart” by Survivor:
Two worlds collide, rival nations
It's a primitive clash venting years of frustrations
Bravely we hope against all hope
There is so much at stake
Seems our freedom's up against the ropes
Does the crowd understand?
Is it East versus West or man against man?
Can any nation stand alone?
Plot synopsis: Fearsome Russian boxer Drago (measurements: 6’5”, 260) wants to come to the U.S. to prove Soviet athletes are better than American ones (or something). Retired boxer Apollo Creed, who hasn’t won a fight in 10 years, takes umbrage. It’s Apollo, not Rocky, whose sense of nationalism is stirred. “This is US against THEM!” he tells Rock. Remember, it was Apollo who fought Rocky in American flag shorts. The guy cared.
Rocky, somehow still the heavyweight champ even though he’s pushing 40, seems disinterested. He wants to stay home in his mansion with Adrian, his kid, Paulie and the robot he bought to entertain Paulie. (Yes, that’s right. A robot. The joke is that the robot is the only character in all the movies who can stand to be around Paulie.3)
Apollo challenges Drago to an exhibition bout in Vegas, and, well, I don’t have to tell you what happens. It’s all fun and games until Apollo is savagely beaten to death in the ring. 4 (The tonal shift from comedy to brutality is very 1985.) Cut to: an extended montage where Rocky thinks about his life, which not only features scenes from the earlier Rocky movies, but footage from the movie that you are currently watching, scenes that just took place minutes earlier. Seriously, if you count the final fight between Rocky and Drago, there are no fewer than five montages in the 91-minute movie. It’s basically one long music video. (Stallone was the director, naturally.5)
Rocky agrees to fight Drago in Moscow, which nobody thinks is a good idea but in no way ever actually amounts to anything substantive. Rocky is never in any kind of danger, and we in the audience just take it on faith that the Soviets run a repressive regime. The Russians in the film are ciphers; they’re objects, not individuals, with Drago the most egregious offender. He says fewer than 50 words during the course of the film. Is he a superior athlete or a failed product of Soviet education?
For reasons that are never explained, the Russian crowd during the course of the fight starts rooting for Rocky over Drago. It may be because Drago punches Rocky in the face, oh, I don’t know, 80 times? But Rocky can take the punishment, cause honestly there ain’t much goin’ on up there anymore, you knowwhatI’msayin’?
Spoiler alert: Rocky wins (rather anti-climatically by my reckoning) and then having noticed the shift in the crowd’s sentiments realizes that, hey, we all aren’t so different after all. As Sting once sang, the Russians love their children too. Or at least he hoped they did.
And if that’s true, maybe we ought to stop pointing our missiles at each other, Rocky tells the crowd:
In here, there were two guys killing each other.
But I guess that’s better than 20 million.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that if I can change
And youse can change, everybody can change
At which point, the actor playing Mikhail Gorbachev stands up and claps. Did Rocky Balboa change the course of human history?
Well, let’s take a look at the timeline:
4.54 billion years ago: Earth forms.
1945: Cold War begins.
Nov. 27, 1985: Rocky IV premieres in the United States.
Jan. 14, 1986: Gorbachev writes President Reagan proposing to abolish all nuclear weapons by the year 2000.
Feb. 22, 1986: Reagan responds with reduction proposals.
Oct. 11, 1986: The parties meet at the Reykjavik summit.
Dec. 8, 1987: The parties agree on nuclear-arms reduction treaty, junking all ground-based nuclear missiles.
In terms of cause and effect, I think the record speaks for itself. The Cold War raged for 40 years before Rocky got involved. But let’s remember who really got the ball rolling: Apollo Creed. He was a showman, but he was also a patriot. Rest in power, champ.6
WHERE CAN I FIND IT: Rocky IV is available (with all the Rocky films) on MAX.
HEY ISN’T THAT: Yes, that’s statuesque Brigette Nielsen playing the wife of Drago (Dolph Lundgren). Nielsen was famously married to Stallone during this period. One of the interesting aspects of the Rocky films is that they sort of tracked Sly’s own journey from unknown actor to megastar and all of the excesses and bad choices that came with that (like starring in, for instance, Rhinestone with Dolly Parton).
DUST CLOUDS: The film came at a time of peak tension between the two powers over sports. The U.S. “Miracle on Ice” had taken place at the Winter Olympics in 1980, but America boycotted the Summer Olympics in Moscow that year over the Soviet Union’s invasion of Afghanistan. The Soviets in turn boycotted the 1984 Summer Games in Los Angeles. It was also a period in which there was widespread suspicion of the use of performance-enhancing drugs by Soviet athletes, a plot point that surfaces in Rocky IV.
ARMAGEDDON INDEX: 5/10: To hear Survivor sing it, there was a lot at stake, so let’s give Rocky the benefit of the doubt and go along with his saving us from World War III.
WHAT ELSE I’M WATCHING: TV: Monsieur Spade (S1, AMC), Curb Your Enthusiasm (S12, MAX), Tokyo Vice (S2, MAX) Movies: Whiplash (Chazelle, 2014), Harvey (Koster, 1950), The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (Gormican, 2022)
SUGGESTIONS: nucleartheater@gmail.com
LAST ENTRY: Atomic Blonde (2017)
NEXT ENTRY: Hiroshima mon amour (1959)
Rocky is infamous in some circles for having won Best Picture over films such as Taxi Driver and Network, but it was a clear marker that things were shifting in Hollywood back toward old-fashioned crowd-pleasers in the wake of the New Hollywood phase of the early 70s. It was part of a cluster of films that included Jaws (horror + high adventure), Star Wars (a 30s serial) and Saturday Night Fever (Rocky on the dance floor) that heralded this transition.
For the record, I loved Rocky II as a kid. We all did. But it hasn’t aged well. It’s basically a remake of the first film with a new ending and extra melodrama thrown in. On the other hand, I remain a fan of Rocky III despite the increasing bombast mainly because Mr. T is an irresistible presence, and it has a decent sense of humor. Also, it’s the film where Apollo somehow taught Rocky how to run faster than him,
Rocky is a very reluctant fighter. He initially turns down Apollo’s offer in the original. He needs his wife to almost die in the sequel in order to get his mojo back. Then his manager has to kick it in the third one for him to feel motivated. And finally his best friend’s death gets him going in Rocky IV. Stay away from this man.
For what it’s worth, Stallone later regretted killing Apollo off.
This where I am forced to point out that Rocky IV made $300 million against a $28 million budget, so yeah, maybe Sly knew what he was doing.
Shout of appreciation for the recently deceased Carl Weathers, who played Apollo with heart and a strong sense of fun. He was able to take the character, originally an Ali-style loudmouth, in new directions and became his own kind of icon in the process.
Rocky IV is easily the most terrible film that I love. Rambo:First Blood Part II is the second most terrible film that I love. This cannot be a coincidence. And both in the same year, grossing $600 million between them, is quite extraordinary.